There’s something that I have noticed that I am starting to get back now that I have started going back to the gym and working on getting my health together. Yes obviously I am starting to feel a little more in shape (a little), and yes the obvious bonus here is that I will be increasing my life span by losing the weight I need to lose and getting it under control. But there is something else that I didn’t realize that I was loosing when I had stopped going to the gym and got off track. My confidence.
Before when I had lost the weight I lost and was feeling healthier and stronger physically, I realize now, that I was feeling better mentally as well and I felt this air of confidence developing inside me that was never really there before. I’ve always struggled with self-esteem issues and issues with self-love and self-acceptance but that period of time when I was on track I had started to feel more confident, and started to love myself even more and my confidence, while it wasn’t through the roof, it was finally present.
I think that among other things, that is what finally made me realize that I have gotten too far off track and that I had to find a way to start back up at the gym again because I was starting to lose the bit of confidence that I had built up. I was starting to look in the mirror and see that woman that I didn’t like so much again, the one that didn’t really like herself. Now that I have been back at this for a couple of weeks now I know that I still have a long way to go but I feel that confidence coming back again and I feel the change in myself on more than just a physical level.
This weight loss journey for me is not solely about the physical matter of losing all of this weight that I have put on by eating emotionally and being able to be medically healthy. This journey is also about me getting to that place emotionally where I am confident within myself and strengthening my self-love and self-acceptance. I’m getting back to loving me again and I’m feeling really good about that!
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