Pleasantly Surprised and Loving the Runner That’s Inside Me (Somewhere)

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woman running on treadmill

So I finally went back to the gym yesterday after not going for at least a month (for many reasons) and I had expected to feel winded quickly and to feel out of shape.  I had expected to not be able to run on the treadmill my first day back to the gym and to feel the weeks that I had been away.  I was pleasantly surprised by feeling the exact opposite of all of that.  

I got on the treadmill and I began with a fast paced walk but quickly bumped it up to running and I felt strong.  In fact I felt stronger running on the treadmill yesterday then I had even felt before when I was going on a regular daily basis.  I felt good to be running and trust me if you knew me and how I was years ago before I ever stepped foot in a gym then you would understand how big of a deal that is.  

I can honestly say that I had never seen myself as being one of those people who like to run but oddly enough I LOVE to RUN now!.  In fact I am even anticipating the day when I feel strong enough and confident enough (because frankly I am not okay with people looking at me while I’m running) to run outside on a track or just around the neighborhood.  I am anticipating even more the day that I can actually entertain the thought of running in some kind of marathon (although I will start of with the small K’s and not a full marathon) because I just want to be able to complete one.  Who knew I was a closeted runner?  

What was also very pleasantly surprising was the fact that my workout clothes were big on me.  I found myself having to actually pull my pants up continually and the last time I had them on they weren’t small on me but they fit just right.  Now there’s actually room in them, the pants actually gather, and I actually got a tad bit annoyed at how many times I had to slow down just to keep pulling them up a little.  I suppose that all the roller skating that I’ve been doing even while missing my workouts in the gym have been still helping me to continue to lose weight.  

Now I just have to get through the struggle of controlling my diet because while my diet is substantially healthier then before I started on this journey, I am honest enough with myself to know that it can still be so much better.  It’s more so the emotional eating that I need to deal with because when I’m feeling any type of emotion, be it sadness, depression, stressed out, or even excited about something, I tend to reach for some type of food and that needs to stop.  

I know that trainers will say to turn to exercise when you are stressed or feeling some type of heightened emotion but usually those emotions don’t hit me until the night time and going to the gym at night is not an option for me.  I am seriously considering getting me an exercise bike (either a regular stationary or a spin bike) for my home so that when I am feeling stressed or sad or whatever emotions, I can just hop on my bike and get them out that way.  Not to mention it would be helpful for my daughter to have something like that in the house as well.  

Well as they say, this weight loss journey that a lot of us are on is more about changing our lifestyle and how we cope with things and not just about what we eat.  It’s more about how we eat and why we eat.  Just remember that you are not in this by yourself and we can all learn to deal with it together.   

Jimmetta Carpenter

Writer/Editor

The Diary: Succession of Lies (Now Available)

Writing as “Jaycee Durant”

http://write-2-be.com/

http://write2bemagazine.com/

https://www.facebook.com/Write2BeMagazine

http://www.facebook.com/people/Jimmetta-Carpenter/1069480310

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