I have to confess…I feel guilty for falling off the wagon.
No I am not an alcoholic or a drug addict so I am not talking about that kind of wagon. There is however this other drug that the rest of the world doesn’t like to admit exists and that is food. I think that people think that people who are obese or just plain fat are that way strictly because they eat a lot and on some levels that may in fact be the truth. What makes a person someone who is addicted to food is the reasons that they eat. It is one thing for people to legitimately eat because they are hungry and if they so happen to get hungry often then that’s okay as long as they are not gorging on food constantly. I for one, since I have been working out, have found that I get hungry more often than I used to and that now I actually have to eat every three hours at least but that is because I am more active by going to the gym. I in fact don’t eat a lot at one time and I happen to get full very quickly (like in three or four bites). Where I fall short is that when I get depressed or lonely or upset or stressed, or just about every emotional type of mood that there is, I turn to food. It is my comfort zone and it is the only thing that I have in my life that doesn’t judge me and doesn’t question me or make me feel like crap. Food is the one thing in my life I can actually control except for now it seems to have taken control over me. I know I have to learn not to use food as my crutch but it’s a lot easier said than done to just step away from that bag of chips or cookies. I guess I need a lot more help and work than even I realized. Something else for me to work on. Until next time….walk away from the sweets!!!
The Diary: Succession of Lies (Now Available)
Writing as “Jaycee Durant”