I have to confess…. I have been letting life get in my way
Life gets in everyone’s way but I tend to handle it in the worst ways for my body and my health. I still go to the gym daily but because I am trying to do more things in terms of my writing career and things of that nature because a lot of financial hardships have been bestowed upon me lately, I have had to cut back on my gym time. I used to be in the gym 5 days a week, 2 hours, sometimes more, a day. Now I still go 5 days a week but I have cut back to an hour, some days a half an hour. I realize that I am still doing good at being consistent as far as going to the gym everyday but I feel so guilty that I have cut back on the hours where as I was going 2 now it’s only 1. I feel like my body isn’t really shedding the rest of what I want it to, but then I have days where I stop and look in the mirror and say to myself “hum, I am losing weight”. Stress is starting to get to me though because I am starting to eat some of the wrong things again. Things that I know that I shouldn’t eat right now. Things that I know are my comfort and depression foods and my old habit. I want to put the things down sometimes, or better yet, not even buy them but when some other thing goes wrong in my life I can’t help but want some ice cream, or those bag of chips, or those m & m’s. I know that I need to do better and I suppose that I’ve won part of the battle by acknowledging that to myself along with the rest of the world. I have to stop letting life get in my way, or at least stop using that excuse, as the reason my journey of weight loss has been such an up and down roller coaster. I guess I still have a long way to go and a lot of myself to work on. Until next time…step out of your own way.
The Diary: Succession of Lies (Coming September 2010)
Writing as “Jaycee Durant”