It feels good when other people start to notice the changes in you that you sometimes forget to stop and see. I mean I am starting to feel the changes in my body and noticing little things here and there but as far as looking in the mirror and seeing the change everyone else is telling me they see, I don’t, not yet anyway.
I know I’m a ways off from being able to notice any drastic changes but I think part of the reasoning for that is because in my mind I’ve looked a certain way for so long it’s difficult to psychologically get past seeing myself as the fat girl. I wonder if, even when I loose the weight that I want to lose, if I won’t still look in the mirror and see the person who started out on this journey. Losing weight is so much more than just the physical aspect of things.
There’s this whole psychological aspect that most of those people who you see bragging about the weight they lost on television don’t like to share and talk about. When you think of yourself in a certain way for the better part of your life it’s a little scary to actually realize that that person you were is not going to be who you are at the end of the whole journey. I’m not saying that I won’t welcome the changes, just that I’m a little apprehensive of them. But in the end I know that change is inevitable and change is ultimately good.
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